Whilst researching upon the mild terms of abuse noted in an earlier Posting, I could not help myself but search for some harsher terms in the interests of discovering what possible origins and historical synonyms existed. Thus I arrived at the conclusion that for this weeks Smut for the Refined should take on a more etymological and less literary bent than in the past, as persuing a wide range of interests is always sure to
Of Ass-Hole little is said other than the term is an Americanization of the Common Coarse Germanic term Arse, which has been found on its own as far back as one thousand years in written English, and poetically compounded with -hole for at least six hundred years. Examples in text "Emoroydes beþ five veynes þat strecch out attiþ þe ers," (for assistance in reading see "An Index of Extinct Letters")and "They lete hange fox tailles‥to hele and hyde her arses." A host of evocative synonyms over time include cule, tut, bewscher, croupon, dock, hurdies, prat(memorialized in the term "prat-fall"), posteriums, podex, fundament, flitch, quarter, hinderland, stern-works, jacksy, sit-me-down, quoit, and rusty-dusty. A notable sub-category detailing terms referring specifically to the cleft offers creek, nock, and nockandro for our enlightenment. In other related tangents the word Kallipyg(which naturally comes from the Ancient Greeks, an Ass Appreciating Culture if there ever was one) may be administered to one who's buttocks are of divine proportion.
Prick is yet another gift from the Germanic heritage of our tongue, with close relatives existing in Old Frisian as well as scads of Norse languages. " To turne his pricke vpward, and cast a weauers knot on both his thumbs behind him," and "The pissing Boye lift vp his pricke." The OED lists all of the usual suspects in cock-synonyms as well as a variety of more creative terms like weapon, pintle, pillicock, tarse, loom, verge, pillock, rubigo, prependent, runnion, pego, membrum vitale, pudding, intromittent apparatus, John Thomas, micky, prong, whanger, winkle, meat tool, swipe, and ding-a-ling
Fuck has a long and storied history, although the vast majority of possible etymologies lay primarily within the range of apocrypha (by way of disputing a popularly held mis-conception: If one wishes to take as gospel the information one finds by way of this fellow and his companions, caveat emptor) and out-right balderdash. I hesitate to paraphrase the following information, so without alteration from the OED:
Probably cognate with Dutch fokken to mock (15th cent.), to strike (1591), to fool, gull (1623), to beget children (1637), to have sexual intercourse with (1657), to grow, cultivate (1772), Norwegian regional fukka to copulate, Swedish regional fokka to copulate (compare Swedish regional fock penis), further etymology uncertain: perhaps < an Indo-European root meaning ‘to strike’ also shown by classical Latin pugnus fist (see pugnacious adj.). Perhaps compare Old Icelandic fjúka to be driven on, tossed by the wind, feykja to blow, drive away, Middle High German fochen to hiss, to blow. Perhaps compare also Middle High German ficken to rub, early modern German ficken to rub, itch, scratch, German ficken to have sexual intercourse with (1558), German regional ficken to rub, to make short fast movements, to hit with rods, although the exact nature of any relationship is unclear.
As someone who has never had the opportunity to fuck a German, I cannot personally attest to how much their intercourse resembles rubbing, making short movements, or being struck with rods, but one can only imagine.
The word has for some time only referred to Carnal Intercourse, which of course is what occurs when one does not copulate with one's Wife and the sole blessed intent of procreating and thereby increasing the number of God's Children upon the this Mortal Sphere, but engages in sinful and depraved fornication for purposes of Gratification of a Physical Nature. As, of course, depraved fornication is almost by definition more interesting than blessed procreation, there are innumerable historical synonyms for carnal intercourse, for example felter, swive, jape, mell, jostle, tup, jumble, grind, commix, wap, bolster, occupy, subagitate, fanfreluche, jig-a-jig, perform, pull a train, and molluck.
As a side note of some small interest, there is a bird named Windfucker. I am telling you the truth, my friend; if you believe me not see Lenten Stuffe by T. Nashe for verification. And then forever ban thyself from reading this web-blog, for I shall have not Doubting Thomases numbering themselves among my Devotees and Acolytes.
Finally, let us finish with a Bang! so to speak, and with no further ado, Take a Look at the History of that most infamous of todays Heavy Cusses: Cunt. It is clearly (note the overall harshness of its pronunciation) of Germanic origin(as are all of the words examined here today. One might be able to argue that the seeming prominence of Germanic origins of coarse language in the English tongue may have to do with the Anglo-Saxons were for some time the under-classes in Southern Britain with the language of the Noble Classes being a form of French adopted by Norse conquerors of first Nuestria, then England(Norman being of course a form of "North Man"), thus leading to Saxon words having a distinctly earthy connotation as compared with the more refined air of the Romance Language additions), with similar phonotypes existing in Norwegian (kunta), Danish (kunte), and the Germanic kunton. The oldest known usage of the term in the English tongue is found in a compendium of informal street names in 13th century London, where one can only imagine what activities would take place upon the illustratively titled Gropecuntelane. Further along in history, in a Folio of "Loose and Humorous Songs," one comes across the lyric "Vp start the Crabfish, & catcht her by the Cunt," unfortunately with little context (or sheet music) for accompaniment. Alternate vernacular terms for the region of interest throughout time include Privy-Chose, the Shell, Lap, Quim (indubitably my favorite, and one I have vain hopes of reintroducing into common parlance), Honey-Pot, Parovarium (or the Organ of Rosenmu(umlat)ller), paroophoron, Minge (my second favorite), Pocket-Book, and Zatch.
Who would I be if I ended this transcription without suggesting some form of diversion by which one can utilize some, if not all, of the delightful information found herein? Attempt to initiate some depraved fornication of your own, using any whatever methods you prefer (myself I utilize a half unbuttoned cardigan accompanied by a partially finished New York Times Sunday Crossword Puzzle, and let my sheer animal charisma do the rest), and then whilst in the midst of fornicating, interject various "pillow phrases" such as "Allow my Rubigo lay entry to your Quim," or "Tumble me in the quoit with your rude pillicock." It will be sure to enliven your life, one way or another.
